Monday, June 2, 2014

Parents need to look at how to overcoming their own shortcomings

1.   Admit you don’t like some of your responsibilities or that you stink at some of them.You can tell me, and I won’t judge you one bit
Remember that admitting our own inabilities frees our children to do that also. They won't think they have to be 100% all the time.. No one can be that anyways. We are all sinners.. We all make mistakes.. And yes even by our own choices we choose to do that which we know is easier when we know it isn't the best choice. 
2.   Sometimes be responsible and do what you don’t like, for the sake of your child. We make our children do things they don’t enjoy, and sometimes we have to, too.
As models for our children we need to realize that we need to show them that there is room for not being perfect. However we need to learn how to do our work and be faithful to our responsibilities
3.   Admit what you’re good at. (Every mom shines in some area.) Put more energy into that activity, to compensate for the weak areas. For example, I loved reading to my children, so I spent hours doing this with them.
Are you a good cook? Are you a good housekeeper.. Speak positively about yourselves as a way to boost your own self worth.. but also so you can show your children that it is okay and even healthy to have things your excited about your own abilities in.. Currently mine is Gardening.. I am falling head over heals in love with gardening!
4.   Pray for God to help you overcome your weaknesses.
Make a real effort to improve in those areas. This will be huge in your life.. but even bigger in your children's lives. Remember they are watching you! My pastor tells us all that "Our children know us better than an Indian knows the forest.." They know what will trigger us to give up.. but if they see us suddenly working through that thing.. It shows them that we expect better from ourselves too.. not just for them to put effort into things like getting better school grades etc..
5.   Be comforted that your child will judge you by your love for him and not by your perfection at being a mom.
Your kid already knows your failures.. It's not like your hiding the faults from him/her.. Especially if you try to hide them they will start to resent you for the things you pretend don't exist.. Want proof of that.. Think of the things you still to this day detest in your own parents from your childhood.. Was mamma a short fuse? Did she blame you for things you didn't do.. Wouldn't it have been easier to forgive it.. had she ever just said.. "Honey I know I sometimes think you did something and I might be wrong.. Can you forgive me?" or "Sorry sweety I didn't mean to bite your head off.. "
Being honest..It will be the one thing that makes the difference. 
Be humble.. If your wrong.. admit it.. ask forgiveness.. Your kids will love you for it. And P.S. So will your husband.. 
Is the biggest step is the first one!

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